Okay, people. I've been sick. Like majorly sick. Like gross, missing days and days of work sick.
So. Story. Well, a few weeks ago my tooth randomly started hurting. So I took some tylenol and started using Sensodyne toothpaste and the pain went away. I thought no more of it. Then last week, the pain came back with a vengeance. I started maxing out my tylenol every 6 4 hours. So I make a dentist appointment and figure I can wait til then. Then, one night after work and baby-sitting, I got home. My tooth was hurting like hell, so I took some tylenol and an ambien sleeping pill. It was 9 PM. Three hours later, I was still awake. And still. In. Pain. So, being stupid, I took 2 tylenol PMs. Still in pain. So around 2 AM I decide I have to do something about this unbearable pain. So I go to the emergency room.
At the ER, the nurse tells me I should have come in as soon as it started hurting since tooth pain is one of the worst pains to deal with. I'm crying really hard and saying, "I agree. It sucks." She tells me to call someone to pick me up, since I'm not going to be able to drive. So I wait to see the doctor. He's super nice and tells me to call my dentist, which I'd already done. So he gives me 2 prescriptions. One for penicillin and one, hello!, for percocet. Percocet is the best stuff ever. I was definitely feeling no pain after taking that shit.
Unfortunately, percocet makes me dizzy and sleepy. So I couldn't work the next day. So I slept and chilled and slept some more. Gross.
I thought I was feeling better this past weekend and on Monday. Then, yesterday, I woke up and started getting ready for work. Then, after taking my penicillin, I felt nauseous. (Let me just take this oppurtunity to say penicillin is the nastiest smelling and tasting shit ever. It's disgusting.) Needless to say, both of the medicines had caught up with me. I spent the day sick. So another work day gone. Grrrr.
I woke up this morning feeling better. So I started getting ready and then found out we had a 2 hour delay. Sweet. I laid back down and went to sleep for another hour. I woke up and decided to straighten my hair, as I do daily. I usually straighten it while wet, but it was dry today. So I turn the straightener on and wait for it to heat up. I straighten half my hair, then put the straightener down to get ready to straighten the other half. When I go to pick it up again, I accidentally pick it up by the hot part. And I proceed to burn the hell out of my thumb and index finger. I throw the straightener down (oops) and run to the sink to put my fingers under cool water. All I have to say is thank God for first aid training. It definitely came in handy. So I've got my 2 fingers bandaged up because the blisters ain't pretty.
I feel like I'm falling apart. I'm in my 20s. This isn't supposed to happen yet! I've still got time! I'm counting down the days til my dentist appointment. It's in 6 days. Can't wait.
I mentioned last time I blogged (I suck at that, btw) that I was gonna discuss my wedding plans and such. I'm still working out some most of them, but I love talking about what I've gots going on so far.
Okay. So location- done. My insanely small town. At the gazebo, next to the river. It's pretty. Reception will be at the park next to the river. Done and done.
Wedding party- done. My bestie is going to be my matron of honor. My fiance's dad will be his best man. That's all we're having. Simple.
Dresses- so completely NOT done. I don't even want to think about wedding dresses anymore. If Old Navy made a wedding dress, I'd be super psyched. Alas, they don't and so I am screwed.
Remember, people, I'm a big girl with big girl curves. So these tiny sample wedding dresses aren't happening. I hate when I go to wedding boutiques and they give me attitude for not being a size 2. I swear I'm just going to make my own dress. Nevermind that I've never sewn before. I'm going to do it. It's a simple wedding, I just need a simple dress. Not so hard.
I did, in my attempts at trying on wedding dresses, discover that I am obsessed with veils. Long veils, short veils, catherdral length veils, I love them all. I can't wait to wear my veil on my wedding day. Now if only dress shopping was as easy as veil shoppping....
You know what else makes me sick? Well, not really sick. My bestie, who's been my bestie for 20 years, could be a freaking supermodel. You know, if they had supermodels who were 5'3. I made her try on dresses one day (after I broke down crying while dress shopping... Story later.) and they looked phenomenal on her. It's not fair! I'm the bride. I should look better. Oh well.
Ok. So story about crying while wedding dress shopping. I'm sure it's not uncommon. I didn't cry because of the dresses or anything. It was the first boutique my bestie and I went to. The first time I looked at dresses in person instead of online. And the salesladies (yes, ladies... I was so important there were 2 salesladies) were putting the pressure on me to find a dress. Just find a dress. And my friend was pressuring me to just try on a dress. And I was thinking about how big this is, getting married. And how my entire life is going to change. Not just my name, but everything. Because once we're hitched, I'm moving 3000 miles across the country to be with him. And I started crying. It sucked.
Yes, peoples. That's right. I'm planning this wedding wih my fiance 3000 miles away. So pretty much the bestie is helping me. And I'm also planning a trip to visit my fiance AND trying to start organizing things to move across the country. On top of work and all that. Luckily, there are only 28 school days left til my summer vacay. I love being a teacher and getting summers off.
I'm all over the place tonight. I'm gonna stop before I scare someone.
I've got the baby fever. And it's a pretty bad case, too. There I was, minding my own business in Target, when all of a sudden I walk by the baby stuff. And BAM! that's all I can think about. Babies and baby names and baby clothes and diapers and bottles and etc.
This is not good. First of all, I'm in the middle of planning my wedding. I don't necessarily need to be thinking about getting knocked up right now. My fiance and I have an agreement to wait til after the wedding. Unfortunately. Because, at the moment, I'd much rather have a baby than get married. It's funny how priorities can change overnight.
So many people around are getting pregnant. One of my friends is pregnant with her 4th. Color me jealous. Everytime I log onto facebook it seems like another friend is saying she's pregnant. Or that his wife/girlfriend/random chick is pregnant. And I'm happy for them, but also intensely jealous. I know what I want.
I'm glad that my fiance is supportive of this and doesn't think I'm crazy. Like I said, we have an agreement to wait to have kids. But he talks about baby names with me all the time and what the nursery will look like and everything. I'm glad he indulges me. It makes me happy. Now, if I was only knocked up, then I'd be ecstatic....
PS- Next entry will involve wedding plans and the dreaded trying on wedding dresses. :)
I'm planning my wedding. This, in itself, is a great thing. I'm completely and totally in love with my fiance. He's truly my soulmate. And I cannot wait to spend the rest of my life with him. But wedding planning is stressful.
First of all, it's my wedding. Well, and my fiance's. But I'm pretty much planning by myself. So we (I) picked the colors red and purple for the wedding. I think they are beautiful together. (Probably seen One Tree Hill too many times.) Problem is, my mom hates those colors. She loathes them. But it's my wedding. So they stay.
Second problem, wedding dresses. I'm a big woman. And most big woman wedding dresses aren't cute. And the ones that are cost a ton of money. Our wedding won't be big. We don't want to spend a lot of money. So I'm not wanting to spend $1000 on a dress I'll wear once.
Third issue, location. At this moment, my fiance and I are living on different sides of the country. He'd like to get married on the west coast. I'd rather be married where I live. All my family and friends are here. Plus, his family lives here. So it makes sense, right? My fiance would rather just go to Vegas and get married in a chapel there, just the two of us.
Honestly, I'm not completely adverse to that option. But I'd like to come back to my state and have a reception with our friends and family. He's okay with that. But he wants to get married in Vegas, go on a honeymoon, then have the small (really, really small) gathering of family.
Another issue is family. His family is small. Just his parents, aunt, uncle, cousin, grandfather, and great-uncle. My family is huge. On just my dad's side, there's 6 aunts/uncles and 20 cousins. Plus my grandmother. And that's just my dad's side. Plus my other "family." My bff and I have been friends for 20 years. And her family has pretty much been my second family. Her mom is my other mom and her sister is like my sister. So I'd want to invite them, obviously. So that would be another 14 (at the most) people. And then people from work. Are they invited? I work with not that many people. (I work in a very small school.) It's 4 other people. And I ♥ the girls I work with. So are they invited? For me, I'd like to invited probably 60 people. Then whoever he wants to invite.
It's so many decisions. I don't know what to do. I'm sure everything will work out. At least I've got the colors, the bridal party (just my bff as matron of honor and his dad (awww!) as best man), the cake, the food (hello, people in my families that can cook!), and the bridesmaid dress picked out.
I guess I just take it one day at a time and don't get too stressed. Wedding 2012, here I come!
Omg. I love my job. I love it. I don't know what I would be doing if I couldn't work with kids. Even better, I love that I get the luxury of working with different ages; from pre-k to 7th grade. And I love that it's a smaller school.
Every month at work we have different themes. So all our art projects and activities involve whatever it is. (Ex: Medieval, Dinosaurs, Going Green, International.) Since today is February 1st, we started our new theme, Creative Sensations. So this month we're going all out with art. I love the art thing. I think it's great. I was all psyched for it. Until we started today's project.
The kids love painting. I honestly hate them using paint. They get it everywhere. I mean, it's okay to be messy. But when they wind up with paint on the floors, on the chairs, on the windows, and on the rug (really?) it's a whole different story. But today we painted. The art project was really fun and they had a great time doing it. I love when they all really get into their activities. It makes it a lot more enjoyable.
The whole thing today was called "Blotto." It's pretty much taking paint and putting it on the paper and folding the paper to make different designs. So. Much. Fun. I swear the kids made 5-10 pictures each. They're currently lying all over the floor, awaiting their time to be hung up.
Cleanup was a disaster, though. Two of us were cleaning and it took almost an hour to get all the paint up. It was worth it, though. The whole building smelled like tempera paint. It was nice. I like the smell. (SN: Cleaning paintbrushes sucks.)
So after work I had a couple of errands to run. I stopped at the grocery store and then went to the library. I noticed people were looking at me strangely. When I got home, I looked in the mirror, I saw what people were looking at. I had paint on my shirt, my pants, in my hair, and on my face. (Later, after removing my jacket, I noticed paint on my arms.) And, on top of the paint splatters, I had a gnarly looking black eye. Because I got hit in the eye with a basketball earlier in the day. Awesome.
This isn't my first foray into blogging. I've actually been blogging (though it wasn't called blogging yet) since 2002. My old blog is now defunct. I guess it was too much pressure to have all my friends reading what I was writing. This time I prefer to remain anonymous.
I just finished reading a book called Miss Invisible by Laura Jensen Walker tonight. It gave me the idea to start this blog. In fact, the reading group questions in the back gave me the itch to start this blog. The book was about a larger woman trying to fit in in a look-obsessed world. She struggles with her image and finding a man who loves her for who she is and not what she looks like.
I totally get that. I'm a larger woman. I don't like saying the word "fat." In fact, I hate it. The thing is, even though I am a larger woman, it doesn't bother me. I guess I'm fortunate, though. I'm young (mid 20s) and I have struggled with body image in the past. I always compared myself to my best friend, T. I mean, she was a size 3/5. How the hell was I going to compete with that? I spent many nights crying when the guy I liked decided he liked her better. It sucked.
The thing is, I'm not supposed to be a small woman. And I've accepted it. I've got big bones and curves. Is that bad? I don't think so. I'm me, stretch marks and curves and largness and all. It's just who I am. And I'm fine with that.
Luckily, I've found a man who does love me for who I am. He's helped me realize that I am beautiful. He tells me all the time that I'm cute and beautiful and (my favorite) lovely. He even tells me I'm sexy.
So, to all you chicks out there who are bigger than a size 14, I say you are beautiful.
